Wednesday 4 April 2012

3 weeks

STILL SMILING

3 weeks time has past and all I can say is that it is just so worth a few weeks pain for such a big benefit and that I am a fool for not doing this before.


15 years of weed ruling my life and for what ? -Weed is a cockhead - FACT lol

Wednesday 28 March 2012

2 weeks ago I was shitting myself !

Sat here 2 weeks ago and I was shitting my self ! But here I am , my head did not explode and have not killed anyone.

Now the stress has almost gone and the anxiety with it. (tablets help but they are not magic) I am so pleased that I have made the first part :o)

Second part -the habit of having an argument/something happening and not running to the dealers 

 I have had a few "do's" with my partner and at the min the only thing that stops me going to score is the fact that i do not want to fuck myself over in life any more I am more confident, controlled and all the other things the other sites say and I didn't believe at first but you have to try it to find out they are right. I even smashed an interview and might have a job after 7 months out of work !!!!!!

I did think about it just to get back at my partner but quickly thought fuck it I am a better person for stopping so why let her drag me down.

When I get stressed at the moment it is hard but tend to walk away and go fishing, gym or just put my head under my pillow on the bed for a while and breath (sounds sad but works).

I am looking forward to getting past the second part but this will take time I know this but not half as hard as the first part as you have all that to go through again if you go back on it and believe me I don't want to do it again 


Financially we are sooooooooooooo much better off about £70 a week better off in fact and enjoying just buying stuff !

Living on benefits I honestly do not know how we managed

On the first week I joined a local gym on a great deal £20 a month but had to pay £45 up front on a rolling monthly contract and handing over the money I would usually buy weed with was really hard but left me with nothing so could not buy any so kind of helped (even though my dealer was really "nice" and would tic me if I wanted but they are only your friends when making money off you, you WILL find this out) however like I mentioned earlier the gym really helps so it was one of the best things I did !




Monday 26 March 2012

Day 12


End of day 12, stressful day I have had today but life goes on.

Still hard but still worth it !

Saturday 24 March 2012

Day 10 !!!

Day 10 still going strong ! hard but still positive follow me on twitter for a more detailed account or just a chat , I follow everyone back. Don't be shy and say Hi :o)